Reaching an end of an era

(Picture taken back in February)

Tonight we reached another milestone. Katie went to bed without me nursing her. I knew it was coming because she has been loosing interest. The last week or so she hasn't wanted to nurse at night. AND, she has been biting me... alot! So, tonight she went to bed happily without me. Not sure how that can be possible, but it's true. My baby is changing every day. Wanting to become more like the big kids.

We are not officially done nursing, we still have our mornings together which she enjoys as do I, but I have the feeling it isn't going to last much longer.

I think God is being really gracious to me in the way that this is happening. I was feeling so sad that I was going to have to wean her anyway. Bill and I are planning to go out of the country on a vision trip in September and we won't be able to take the littles with us (that is a whole other post in and of itself). I knew I needed to start the process of weaning her but had really been dragging my feet about it. I feel better about the fact that she is naturally weaning herself. Then I won't feel so guilty, although I will still be a little sad about it.

I know there are many out there who will not understand my heart in wanting to nurse her for a long time. I just think that breastfeeding is such a beautiful thing and such a sweet time with my baby. I really am going to miss it.


But instead of dwelling on the sad side of this I will look for the positives and look to the days ahead with joy. We are moving ahead with life as we should. :) Getting out of this baby phase will be so strange as I have either been pregnant or nursing a baby for the last 10 years.  That's a LONG time! It has been good.

So I wonder what the days to come will be like? I wonder what freedom there will be in not having a baby nurse?  

I guess I'm about to find out...

One year ago

Kaitlyn Joy became a part of our family. It was an amazing day. You can read her birth story here. You can also read about what the kids thought when they first met Kaitlyn here.

I put together a little video of her of the day she joined our family. It was such a special day for all of us filled with so much joy. One that we will never forget.

On the eve of childhood

My eyes are heavy from a long full day. I should be crawling into bed right now because morning will come early. I just can't seem to force myself to go though...not quite yet anyway. I am not ready to wake tomorrow.

My baby is going to be one!

 

I am trying to articulate all the emotions swirling around my mind. This day has crept up on me. It has been a day mixed with tears, both sadness and joy.  I wanted that time would slow down just a little this year. I wanted to enjoy each day, and honestly I  have. I have enjoyed getting to know her and watch as her little personality emerges. She fits her name well...pure joy. It's what she is.

I wanted to hold her a little closer and nurse just a little bit longer.  I have and I will.

But the days are fleeting.

I am excited to see who she will become and what God has planned for her. But I am not ready for her to stop being a baby just yet. She is my last and it is so bittersweet.  Some days more bitter then sweet, but I taste the good in what is to come.

Oh sweet one, I will close my eyes tonight and continue to thank God that He blessed us with you (our surprise gift). You were a good thing from above.

Tomorrow when we wake we will celebrate you and the life He has given. I will soak up every last moment until the day is gone. And when the next day comes we will hold on and look forward to what your childhood will bring.

But just so you know, my heart won't let go...you'll always be my baby!

Friends forever

This morning as I was nursing Katie, Claire came over to be near us. At the sound of Claire's voice Katie stopped eating and looked over at her. They both smiled at each other.

"Katie, you are so fluffy." Claire exclaimed laughing. Katie responded by laughing. "Why is Katie fluffy?" I inquired. "Because she has so much hair." was Claire's response.

Already I can see a friendship blooming between these two. Right now they adore one another. I just pray that through the ebb and flow of their relationship over the years that they will remain close.

Friends forever.

Chubby

Found this picture in my archives. Taken back in February. I just love my chubby baby. Some day I am going to miss those sweet cheeks.

10 months

What a beautiful sunny day we had today. I had to take to opportunity to get some outside pictures (since we were already outside playing). Kaitlyn was 10 months on the 16th so these are a little late. I doubt she changed too much in those couple of days. :) Hard to believe that in just 2 months my baby girl is going to be a year. Oy! Not sure if I can handle my last baby growing up.

I just love her hair! And those cheeks!

Silly girl! She loves to smile and make funny faces at us.

I just can't resist those beautiful eyes!

So thankful she is mine.

7 months

7 months old on the 16th.

~She has 2 little teeth.

~is now rolling all over the place to get what she wants.

~still does not sit up unassisted yet, but we are getting there.

~loves to chew on everything.

~loves her little blankie. She grabs it every time I put her in bed and snuggles it close.

~Very curious about everything.

~I have to nurse her in the other room away from people because she won't eat otherwise. She has to know what is happening around her.

~Thinks playing with her feet is fun.

~Draws a lot of attention whenever we go out.

~Is still smiling all the time.

I need to redo these pictures when she doesn't have chapped cheeks, but I still thought they were too cute not to share. :)

This moment

You and I
we fit just right

Snuggled close

please don't grow so fast

I drink it in

Savor each moment

I'll keep you nearby

As long as it lasts

I never imagined
but
God knew
He gave us you

our sweet surprise

Katy at 5 months

She still smiles all the time

learned to roll from front to back and back to front (look out world)

chews on everything

might be teething

giggles especially at James

is looking more and more like a combination of James and Anna

Can't sit up yet but is working on it

loves her swing 

loves to be in the sling (as long as she can see out)

Needs to see what is going on (especially when nursing)

Melts your heart

is a good sleeper

endlessly entertains us all

is such a sweet soul

4 months

4 months already!

Almost rolling over. She did it once but I suppose I don't put her down often for her to practice.

Katy is always smiling! This is kind of a goofy picture of her but I wanted to show off her dimples.  I need to work at getting a better picture of that precious smile.

Loves, LOVES to chew on her finger! She always has that hand and those fingers in her mouth. And she is always drooling. She needs to wear a bib all the time because if she doesn't she soaks her clothes and I have to change her several times a day.

What a sweet and pleasant person she is.

I need to do an actual 4 month photo shoot, these didn't turn out how I was imaging them to. Oh well, just another excuse to take more pictures of my baby. {smile}

Tuesday morning sweetness

Because who can resist a little pink sweetness.

Those cheeks are just too kissable.

"Mirror, mirror on the wall..."

Two fair ladies.

The way she came

Wouldn't you love to step outside and find this sweet thing outside your door? I know I would. Oh wait, I don't have to because she lives inside my door! :)

A funny story about these pictures. First of all taking pictures of newborns can be sort of tricky...especially naked ones. You need to be prepared for what can happen when you take the diaper off. In that first picture, you can't see it but there is a nice size puddle on the ground next to the box that Katy is on. This happened almost as soon as I took her diaper off. At first I wasn't sure what to do but then figured oh well and kept going. I cleaned up the mess when I was done. :) The other thing I wanted to mention about photographing newborns is that they are fairly pose-able.  I wish I had remembered that for the first picture. It would have looked cuter if she was all scrunched up like the second one. Oh well, live and learn.

I think taking pictures of babies is one of my favorite things to do, and if I was a "real" photographer maybe that's what I would specialize in. :) Thankfully I have my own baby and can get my fill of that for the time being.

3 months

Oh my sweetness!
Katy how have you gotten
so big
so beautiful
so precious?

Can't believe you are ours!
Could spend all day
staring into those eyes
kissing those sweet cheeks
What a gift!