Until we meet again

I've been thinking a lot about life and death and what really matters...

The call I've been expecting came. My sister on the other line, "Elizabeth, I think it's time you come. She doesn't have much time left." I quickly got online and booked a ticket for a few days later. My mom who has had serious health issues for a long time is nearing the end of her time here on earth. Even though it's been a long process and a long time leading to this point, still nothing prepares your heart for that message. Nothing prepares your heart for having to say goodbye to one you love.

I flew out east last weekend (Jan. 29-Feb. 1) and took Claire with me. My mom has not even meet Claire yet.
My sister did her best to tell me how Mom would look and how things would be. I couldn't help but have knots in my stomach as I walked down the hall of the nursing home to see Mom. Not knowing how my heart would feel. Strangely, as I walked into the room all I felt was peace. A surreal peace. I know it came from God, otherwise I would have been a mess.

When I looked at Mom all I saw was the good things about her. The Lord reminded me of happier days. When it comes down to it, the hurts and misunderstandings from the past just don't matter. Not that they have in a long time. But in the face of eternity...most things just don't matter any more. I hear my mom's sweet voice and her contagious laugh and her love for reading, which led us on many adventures in my childhood. You can't see it on the outside but she is still there...the same woman who gave me life. I stood before a woman who was broken and sick but yet is standing on the brink of an eternal healing. My heart breaks but yet we know that there is something better in what is to come.

I saw my sister who has selflessly cared for my mother the past 2 years. Her love is amazing and inspires me to be a better person. I saw my brother who has become a strong godly leader and I am humbled. I learned many things about myself and the kind of woman God wants me to be. Good things come from ashes. The beauty of what really matters in the face of tragedy. I know I will be forever changed by this.

I am so thankful for the time I could spend with her and my sister and brother. Mom wasn't always awake when we were with her, but it was good to just be in her presence. She loved Claire and was so thrilled to see her. Claire brought much joy to my mother and in turn brought joy to me.

The tears of grief and sadness did not overwhelm until I realized that my goodbye would be my last. I wept when Bill picked me up at the airport. Still full of peace that God is in control, but heartbroken non the less. How do you say goodbye to one you love? It is impossible. So I won't. This life is just a moment. We are only passing through. Soon we shall meet again in glory. No more tears no more pain...God be praised!

I love you mom!

Until we meet again in His presence...

*Just want to say, thanks for those who have been praying for us. We have felt your prayers. This has been an extremely rough road, but God is good. They told us on Thursday that Mom had less then 24 hours left. Amazingly she is still with us. We don't know how much time she has here but we do know it is not long. It could just be a few more weeks, could even be a few months (although that looks doubtful). Our prayer is just for her comfort as she has been in so much pain, and also that the Lord would give her peace.