My mother's day

4 little ones
soon to be 5

How did I ever become so blessed?

they are the best gifts
for which I am so thankful!

It feels so good

to have my old friend back! :)

After 3 months of not having my camera I finally got it fixed (for free I might add). I didn't realize how much I really missed it until it was back in my hands.

I'm feeling a little rusty...however, I think I'll find my grove again soon. I've been feeling more inspired these days. But It really doesn't have anything to do with my Camera. It's just good to have it back so I have an output for that inspiration. :)

Professional family pictures

If you get a chance and you want a sneak peek. You can head over to Pam's blog to see some of the pictures she took of us when my family was out here! I am in love with all of them. As always Pam does such an amazing job. I don't know how she did it...manage to get a picture that James was actually sitting still and looking at the camera. He was in one of those moods where he was just NOT going to do what we wanted. But, I knew that if anyone could do it, it would be Pam. :)

Thanks Pam for all your hard work! These are precious memories that you documented for us. It means more to me than I can express!

The kind of man he is

I called my dad tonight to wish him a happy Father's day. In the course of our conversation he ended up telling me how proud he was of me...and how thankful he was that I was his daughter. Those were the kind of things I was supposed to be saying to him. It is Father's day after all. I called to tell him what a wonderful father he is, and he ends up telling me how much he loves me. That is the who my dad is. Always thoughtful, humble, godly. I don't know what I would do without his encouragement and wisdom. I often find myself at a loss as to how to express my gratitude towards him. I have an amazingly supportive father. I could not be more blessed. I am so grateful for any and all time we get to spend with him.

Thank you dad for all you do for us. I thank God for who you are and that I get to be your daughter. You mean more to me then I would ever be able to say. Thank you for always being there for us and for your thoughts and prayers.

Happy Father's day. I love you!

They call him dad

You guide our little ones and they look up to you and follow

You cherish and find joy in them and they adore you.

Your strong hands protect, encourage, and love...and they trust and love you in return.

I am so thankful that our children have such a godly man to call daddy.

Happy Father's day Bill!

She has tears

5:30 am came way to quick this morning. Neither Bill or I had slept well, maybe we were just anxious about the morning...I don't know. Everything was set to go so all we needed to do was make coffee, shower and eat breakfast. (Bill's parents had the older kids spend the night so we wouldn't have to worry about them. My dad flew in to be with us, which was such a blessing.) We woke a sleepy baby and headed out the door by 6:30 am.

I felt mostly calm as we walked through the doors of the out patient surgery center. Bill and I hated the idea of our baby having to be put under, but we knew this was for the best. Claire has had blocked tear ducts since her birth, and the Dr. finally said that it wasn't going to clear up on it's own so minor surgery was the best option.

From the beginning Claire showed everyone there just how feisty she was. She yelled and screamed at anyone who came near her (even the poor receptionist who had to put a wrist band on Claire.). The nurse who took us back to a small room said that once they gave her some meds she would calm down. The medicine helps them relax so that that separation isn't traumatic. She told us that the kids don't even cry when they leave their parents. I leaned over to Bill and said, "watch, I bet Claire will prove them wrong." Well sure enough, Claire put up as much a fight as she could (She would have fought more except for the drugs that were trying to take effect on her) when they came to take her from us. She screamed, "Noooo" and then pouted a bit as they walked away with her. That was the hardest part for us...seeing them walk away with our baby.

Before we knew it they were calling us back to the recovery room. We walked in to find Claire yelling at the nurse. :) Yep, that's our girl! The surgery went very well. The Dr. wants to see us in a month to follow up. They stuck a probe down both eyes and into her nose, and then a balloon to open up her tear duct. It appears to have worked. If it doesn't close back up they won't need to go back in later to put a stint in. Of course we are praying that this is her only surgery.

Claire did get sick on the way home and threw up all over everything. But, other then that her recovery has been great. You wouldn't even know she had anything done today. She has been running around playing all afternoon.

The most amazing part about today was when Claire was a little upset on the ride home and started crying. I looked over and saw something so beautiful...tears! She has not shed many tears before, as she was unable to. Even Claire was surprised by it. She reached her pudgy little hand up and touched her face in shock, and looked at me as if to say, "What is this wet stuff." We are praising the Lord for tears tonight.

I leave you with a few pictures from today.

Claire all ready for surgery in her tiny hospital gown.

Playing with her hospital bracelet. She really didn't like it and kept asking what it was.

She took turns snuggling with Daddy and Mommy.

Look at those beautiful tears! Thank you God!!! Not that I like to see my baby cry, but how amazing to get to see that her surgery worked!

Thank you so much to all of you who prayed for us today! We really felt and appreciated all of them!

A story of God's provision

A few months ago we had to say goodbye to an old friend. A friend who had been faithful, who had seen us through many years, through the the births of 3 of our babies. We have taken many trips with and made lots of memories...good and bad. :) Sometimes we called her, "the grocery getter" or "Station wagon" but mostly and most affectionately referred to as the Buick!

Our Buick bit the dust at the beginning of January. This came on the heals of just loosing our second car, Bill's work car. We were down to one working car at the time. It started when we noticed a loud noise in the rear of the car just a few days before Bill was scheduled to leave town for 5 days for work. We didn't have a chance to take the car in before he left, so Bill asked me to have it looked at while he was away. He flew out on a Monday.

I made arrangements and had a friend follow me to the mechanics to drop it off. I took it in Tuesday night figuring that I would have it back on Thursday to be able to pick Bill up at the airport. Well, Because we got a big snow storm that week, our mechanic got behind and was not able going to be able to look at it until Friday. That was a problem. I called Bill and we talked about what I should do. He suggested that I just go pick the car up so that I could just have a car, and we would take it back in the following week. Something in my gut just said this was a bad idea. I told Bill I just didn't feel right about it. I didn't think we should drive the car. Bill said he trusted my judgment.

I decided to leave the car with the mechanic and borrow my sister in laws car to pick up Bill (which happened to be on my birthday). It turns out that that "gut" feeling I had was more likely the Holy Spirit. Our mechanic called Friday afternoon with some bad news. He said he was so sorry to have to tell us this, but he would not be able to fix the car. The bottom of the car was so rusted out, and the part that holds the wheels onto the car was rusted also. Basically the wheels were about to fall off the car. He said it wasn't even safe to drive home. We needed to have it towed off his lot. That of course is NOT the kind of news you want to hear (especially when we had just put $800 into the car to fix another problem about 2 weeks before that) when it is your only working vehicle.

There was nothing more we could do then to call a towing company, and pray that God would provide something soon. We had zero leads on a vehicle, and hated to just sink money into a car when we HAD to do it, without really have the proper time to research.

That Friday night after we had gotten the news about our Buick, Bill ran to the store (with a borrowed car) to pick up diapers. On his way out the door he ran into a friend of ours (who also happens to be the youth pastor at our church). Somehow during the course of conversation our car situation came up. Well, it just so happened that this friend had just purchased a van and was selling his older one...he had already offered it to his brother, but said that if his brother didn't want it we could have first dibs. Bill of course said yes we would be interested. He came home and told me. I wondered if this could be it...

Our friend Seth called the next morning to say that his brother had decided to buy his van, but... his brother was selling his own van (Yeah I know, it sounds confusing). It was a little older then the one Seth was selling...but get this...he was selling it for an unbelievably good price...like it was PERFECT for our budget. Bill went with Seth to look at the van Sunday afternoon. It didn't take him long to decide that this was the vehicle for our family. It was a great car, ran perfect, and it could fit us all in comfortably. We were also really happy to be able to buy from another believer. It was like the great van swap. :)

I couldn't believe the timing of all of this. The fact that Bill and Seth just "happened" to be at the store (and Bill never goes to the store) at the same time, that we received bad news about our car, and Seth had one for sale all on the same day...amazing! God's timing couldn't have been any more perfect.

While were were sad to see an old friend go, we were equally as happy to welcome a new addition to our family! :) Praise God for His provision!

Enjoying the first ride in the new "addition" to our family! :)

A year in review

It's hard to sum up a year but here are a few thoughts and pictures to go with it.

new baby
new job
lost teeth
kindergartner
2nd grader
toddler
play dates
family outings
love grown stronger
learned new skills
lots of firsts
a few lasts
crazy days
20 inches of snow in one storm
flood
the beach
owies
surgery
kisses
hugs
heartaches
lots of good food
laughter
tears
friendships developed
memories made

What an amazing year it was. God is good through it all...the good and the bad.

Now to 2009. There are BIG things in store for our family; life changing, God things! So stay tuned. I have the feeling it is going to be an amazing adventure!

The Peace that follows

After I posted about my fears a month ago, I was totally blown away by everyone who reached out to me through comments, e-mails and phone calls. The prayers that have been prayed for us have meant so much to me. Thank you friends for loving us and taking time to care.

God is so good. Although I still don't have any idea what is going to happen with our family, and we don't know where and when God will provide a job, I have total peace at the moment. I know that this is only from God. I walked through 2 weeks of complete fear. I let it consume me. I lost hours of sleep. It overtook me and literally made me sick. I realized that it was a sin on my part to get so caught up in worrying about something that might or might not happen. I had to surrender to God and lay my burdens at his feet.

The job in AZ didn't work out. Can I say I am happy about that? :) That however doesn't mean that Bill still won't have to take a temp job away from here. We just don't know. However he does have a job interview here on Thursday. So I am praying for God's will. In my mind this job would be so great. It's a permanent placement, and it's close to home. I am trying NOT to get my hopes up...I know that this could be a long road. He may not get the first job he interviews for. I am resting in the moment and trusting that God does have a plan...and His plans are always perfect. I don't need to fear anything!

If you think of it, please pray for Bill Thursday. His interview is at 9 a.m. This is the biggest interview he has ever had. It's 5 hours long!!

And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Phil. 4:7

You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you. Isaiah 26:3

An evening to remember

Our date night last night was so great! After we dropped the 3 older kids off at church, to be watched by several loving families, Bill and I headed up to the bluff. We sat in the car, overlooking the lake, and reminisced while I fed Claire. We talked about our first date, first time we held hands, and other fun memories. In that moment all was right and perfect. I LOVE being with Bill. He is the one after 8 years of marriage I still day dream about. He still makes me laugh with the things he says. My heart still flutters when he looks at me! :) I will not pretend that we have a perfect marriage...we don't. We have our hard moments. But, I feel very blessed to have this man in my life. I am very much in love with my husband.

After I was done feeding Claire, we headed over to Bill's parents. They offered to watch Claire so we could go to the movies. We decided to see the movie Expelled. Not a romantic movie, actually it's a documentary, but we both really liked it. It was very interesting. I highly recommend it!

I would say we had the perfect night. It really wouldn't have mattered what we had done..any time together is great! I had Bill's mom snap a picture (of course Bill had to blink, and then the camera died so we couldn't retake it. :) ), to capture this monumental evening.

I am so thankful for the evening out. I love being together as a family, but time away as a couple was definitely needed!

A Date

I am so excited!! I am going on a date with my man tonight! We have not gone out in over 10 months!!! One of the ABF's (Adult Bible Fellowship) in our church is watching all of our ABF's kids. There are probably over 30 kids that they will be watching. This is such a blessing that they are doing this. I don't care what Bill and I do tonight, just having the time alone will be wonderful.

I am almost giddy with excitement to have a date. I think I will actually put on some makeup and make myself look nice! :)

Spring

The first sign...spring is on the way!

You are Good

I have to say I feel very blessed. I am so thankful for the church family that God has placed us in. They have just poured out love to us and been so supportive. I had been really nervous about adjusting to having 4 little ones. Bill had to go back to work that Monday after Claire was born, so I was on my own! I don't have a mom that can come over and help out. I don't have my family close by that I can call to pick up and help out whenever. I'm not complaining about that, it's just that way things are. However, we have been so blessed with friends from our church who I consider to be like family, and have stepped in often times and filled in where there was a gap.

I have had so many offers of help lately. I have had a few friends come over so I can run Claire to the Dr. or get to the grocery store. We have had meals and gifts...we have been so spoiled! I am without words to express the gratitude I feel towards everyone.

Last Sunday was our first time taking Claire to our church. I love how excited everyone is for us and the love that has been shown. It is so great to be in a place where life is embraced and celebrated...the world is so opposite of that. There is something so comforting about being surrounded by people who love you and desire to help you raise your little ones to be godly.

I mentioned that when I was in labor I listened to the CD "Sing Over Me". My friend Bethany had recommend it to me, and I am so glad she did. I was listening to it the other day and the song, "You are Good" really struck me. God has blessed our family so much...through good times and bad. He has given us everything we need. This song embodies everything I have felt over the past year. It is a beautiful love song to our Heavenly Father.

We praise you God because you ARE good! Thank you for the hands that you have lent to help us out when we have been in need. Thank you for loving us and for your grace. I pray that my life can reflect You, and that you will use our family for Your glory.

Claire's birth day story

Wednesday Feb 20th. I started having contractions. They continued throughout the day. The kids and I spent the day baking and getting things ready to put in the freezer (I will try and post those recipes at some point). By about 11 p.m. my contractions were 5 to 7 minutes apart. Bill decided around 1 a.m. to call his parents and bring the kids to their house. We thought this was it and baby was on her way...however, we were wrong. The contractions completely stopped by 3 a.m. Talk about disappointing. I felt really dumb because we had called Bill's parents in the middle of the night. You would think that by the 4th baby, I would know when I was in labor! :)

Thankfully I had my 40 week appointment scheduled for that Thursday morning. Bill decided to stay home from work and go with me to the Dr's. Dr W. checked me when we got into his office and agreed that it was false labor...I wasn't dilated at all. So, he gave Bill and I a few minutes to talk over and decide if we wanted to wait it out another week to see if I would go into labor on my own, or schedule to be induced. Bill and I talked (and I prayed silently) and decided to go ahead with the induction. Dr. W. asked us if he could get us in that morning would we want to do the induction then. Bill and I both said yes. It seemed like perfect timing. The kids were being taken care of and Bill was off work, and we even had our bags packed and in the car with us. Dr. W. called over to labor and delivery and they said they had an open room.

They started my induction around 10 a.m. Dr. W told the nurse to let him know as things progressed because he knew my labor would go fast. I was still having contractions on my own, so the Pitocin just sped things up.

My friend Janel stopped by with a "being induced" care package. I had called her to let her know that I was in the hospital. So she ran out and bought a magazine, sucky candies, and a bouquet of pink tulips. :) Unfortunately I didn't get much of a chance to enjoy them, because things went so fast. They came in (around 12:30) to give me my epidural not more then 10 minutes after Janel left. The epidural was so much more painful then I remembered it. :( But Bill was there and was so wonderful through the whole thing.

Dr. W. came down and broke my water around 1 p.m. I knew at that point that things would go fast. I laid back (they made me stay on my back) and just tried to relax and rest. It was really hard for me to relax for some reason. I kept shaking. Bill stood by my side and held my hand and tried to help me feel calm. It really was such an amazing process. Bill put on some music we had brought with us; "Sing Over me" and "The Living Room Sessions". Both were so peaceful and so full of praise and worship. I had prayed that God would be glorified through this whole day and that I could keep my eyes on Him. I rested and prayed.

Before I knew it I was feeling a lot of pressure. It was kind of funny to see the look on Bill's face when I told him things felt "different". I told him I thought I was going to have to push. The nurse had just walked out, and Bill frantically started to look for her. She had just been right around the corner. :)

They called my Dr to come because I was ready. The nurse asked me to do a practice push, I was about to when she suddenly changed her mind, "Uh you better wait for the Dr. The head is right there." She exclaimed!

It took 3 pushes and our sweet Claire was out (at 3:37 p.m.)! Her cry was the most amazing beautiful cry. We waited so long to meet her, and now she was finally here. Bill squeezed my hand, and tears filled my eyes. I was just in total amazement. I have never had such a wonderful birth experience. It was so so easy and peaceful!

I felt so great after Claire was born. Bill and I joked and laughed the whole time we were in the hospital. I have never felt more in love with my husband. He was and has been so sweet and supportive. He reaffirmed me by telling me how great I did, and how proud he was of me. He agreed that it was totally amazing.

My whole pregnancy and birth experience were such a gift from God. I really can't put into words what I feel right now. I am SO blessed. God has been so good to us. I am just so thankful!

Dr. W. with Claire.

Holding Claire for the first time.

Not the best picture of me...but I'm not going to be vain here! :)

Sweet kisses from Daddy.

First look at Claire

It's late here. I just finished nursing my sweet baby, and I am ready to go to sleep, but I wanted to get on here and post a few pictures.

I will write more when I get a chance. We are all doing great! I could not have asked for a better birth day.

For this we prayed

Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above...

Announcing the arrival of our baby girl

Claire Eliana

born at 3:37 p.m.

Weight, 8 pounds 7 oz.

Length 21 inches

More details and pictures to come...

Thanful

We have managed to make it this cold and flu season without really getting sick. Ryan had a bad ear infection a few weeks ago, but that has been the only sickness in our house so far...until now that is. Anna and James came down with a cold Sunday night...and now germs have been passed on to me. Ugh, I really want to rid the house of sickness before the baby is born. So we are trying to rest and drink lots of fluids. Resting is hard for me to do. I like to stay busy. I really do like to stay on top of my housework (not always accomplished, but I try).

Last night, seeing that I was worn out and sick, Bill offered to help with everything. He and the kids picked up the house, put supper away, did the dishes. Anna also folded all the towels that I had washed and she vacuumed the living room. Here I was worried about how things are going to go after baby girl comes...Bill sweetly reminded me that I have all of them to help out.

I am so thankful for the loving helpful husband I have; and for my little ones who at this point love to help around the house!

So, today I am concentrating on getting better, not worrying about what doesn't get done, and letting Bill help out where it is needed. :)

A full heart

For You, O LORD, have made me glad by what You have done, I will sing for joy at the works of Your hands. Psalm 92:4

Sometimes I feel so overwhelmed with love for my Savior. He is so good to me. I am so undeserving, and yet He continues to pour out His blessing to me. It just amazes me...God obviously knows our deepest longings and our hearts desires and the fact that He would choose to bless me, just blows me away.

Before we found out we were expecting baby #4, I knew in my heart that I would love to have another baby. We just weren't planning on it because of our circumstances. Thankfully God is in control and He knew better then us at what was the best timing. I felt it was selfish to think this, but my heart longed for another daughter. I'm not sure why, I really was content with the 3 little ones we have. I LOVE having the daughter I do have, and my boys...what can I say, they are so dear to me. But yet my heart longed...

Yesterday I had my 28 week Ob appointment. He decided to do another ultrasound just to double check the gender of the baby. My Dr. wasn't able to completely see everything at the last ultrasound. Well, this time he said for 100% certainty that it is in fact a girl!

I would NOT have been sad if it had turned out to be a boy. In fact, before I had Anna I always thought that I would rather just have all boys. :) But, my heart felt completely full when the Dr said for sure that we have been blessed with another daughter. It is really hard to describe the emotions that I felt. Maybe it sounds funny, but I really feel as though this baby completes our family(at least for now ;) ). Each of our children are such a blessing and add a unique quality to our family. I am excited to see how this little girl will fit into all of that, and what God has in store for us as a family of 6!!!

Thank you God for making me a blessed woman. I stand in awe at your goodness. Thank you for continually teaching me about what it means to have joy. I praise you God for this gift of life that grows within me. Thank you that she is fearfully and wonderfully made. I pray that each of our little ones would come to love you and see their need for you. Help me to be the mother You want me to be. Thank you for filling me, for knowing my needs, and for even giving me the desires of my heart. I am so undeserving. Your grace and love overwhelm me. My heart sings for joy at the works of Your hands. My delight is in You oh Lord!

*The picture is a close up of the baby's face. It really isn't very clear. You can see her nose, her cheek and an eye. It was much clearer on the computer then what the Dr. printed up. We got to see the baby sucking her thumb and moving her lips and moving her hands and fingers. It was a really fun apt. The kids were all excited to see the baby.

Happy Thanksgiving

I am in the midst of baking pies, and side dishes and turkey, but I wanted to take a second to wish everyone a happy thanksgiving! My dad flew in yesterday to spend a few days with us...yea!! :) So, we will be enjoying good food (made all by yours truly) and each others company, and some shopping tomorrow. I am excited about making the whole meal myself, I have never done it before.

I hope you all enjoy your day, and are able to take time to reflect on everything God has given us to be thankful for!