So why you might ask, am I looking for a new library? Well, I am pretty sure we have ticked off the children's librarian one too many times. The last time we were there must have been the straw that broke the camels back. I understand that my 2 year old is loud and likes to run, so I really try my hardest to keep my eye on him or follow him around. If he gets to be too much I usually strap him back into his stroller seat (to which he LOUDLY protests). One time a few months back I tuned my back for a minute to get a book off the shelf for Anna, and before I knew it James had decided to give one of the stuffed animals a bath in the drinking fountain. UGH! The Liberian rushed over and said something (in her sweet librarian voice) about not putting the animals in water. I apologized. We put the incident behind us and moved on. Well, it happened again last week. Before I could grab James he had put the SAME stuffed dog under the water fountain. I rung it out and left it to dry. The Liberian was not around for me to say anything to and I needed to leave, so I just left (Yeah I feel guilty about that, maybe I should have searched for her and things would have ended better?).
Oh and not to mention that I had to pay a fine recently for a book that we returned that was TOTALLY ruined. I have no idea how it happened, we always take good care of the things we check out. But whatever the case I had to pay a whopping $20 fine!!! I am sure this was another thing to add to my already long list of reasons for the Liberian not to like me. And I am sure at this point she assumes that any mess that is made in the children's section is due to my kids...which it usually isn't because I make sure they pick up after themselves...anyway...
This all brings us to this afternoon. I let James out of the stroller at the library and kept a VERY careful eye on him (especially since we were the only ones there AND the Liberian was sitting right there. :)) He was good for a few minutes but then I decided that he needed to go back in the stroller because he was too wild and I needed to pick out some books. He started screaming, but I thought "Oh well, I'm sure she would rather have him scream then get into something." I hurried up and picked out what I wanted and then turned went to check out. As soon as I got over to the desk, I heard the fountain running. I turned around and saw that James could reach the button from where he was sitting, so I started over to move him away. Just as I did this, the Liberian pops her head up and says, "Is that the fountain I hear, because the last 2 times Clifford ended up taking a bath in the fountain and he had to go home to be washed." I just said "Oh, well James doesn't have Clifford this time and he is strapped in his stroller."
Sigh! I knew right then and there, by the tone of her voice that I had lost any chance of the mother of the year award, HA! I could tell by the way that she tried to talk sweetly and cover her true feelings of disgust towards me. I am going to have to go somewhere else from now on...I have been trying to swallow my pride and still take my 2 year old out in public, but I may have to resign that I either can't go out or I must find another place to get our books.
First it was the Dr's office (yeah and I didn't even write about my last Dr.'s experience where the Dr. scolded my child and said something in jest like, "I don't know why you would let James go when you knew he would just run away"...don't worry I am over that now.) At one point I thought I was going to have to find a new play group because of how aggressive James is with all the little girls, but since there aren't any more playgroups I don't need to worry about that. But now it's officially time to move to a new library.
Please don't get me wrong I LOVE LOVE having boys. I love James he is funny and sweet and my life would not be complete without him, but sometimes it is a little discouraging. Sometimes I just don't know what to do. Are there any other moms of boys out there that have trouble with the wildness?? Please tell me I am not alone! No offence to you moms of just girls (because I have daughters also) but until you have a boy I just don't think you can understand. Hopefully I am not stepping on any toes by saying that, because I am sure I've stepped on more then enough already today.
9 comments:
Yes, I will say it... "you are NOT alone!" I can totally relate.... my boys are both a bit older than yours, and their antics have changed... but believe you me, they can still be quite obnoxious. These days, my biggest "trouble" is Afton... she can give just about any boy a run for their money... Haha! Gotta love those BUSY kids!
Something tells me that librarian has no children of her own, or just one very docile child, or they are all grown up! I say it serves them right for putting a water fountain in the children's section of all places! LOL!
Are you kidding? I have so many embarrassing stories. My boy was definitely more of a handful then my girls. I'd taking the whining over the wildness any day! But now as they are in their teens...I'll trade in the girls. ;)
Keep pressing on Elizabeth, you are doing a wonderful job. Don't let the world judge you. The ones who are judging you have never had a child - or a wild child, so how could the know?
On the positive side, it does get better with age. Just keep being consistent with his discipline and reward good behavior. This too shall pass!
Children can always be a challenge no matter what the age, but I wouldn't give them up. I am continually thankful that I adopted my 5 which means I added 2 boys. Now, in 3 wks. I will be adding 2 more boys to the mix. They can be loud & wild but also very loving & caring. Enjoy each age. It may not always be easy, but it is worth it.
Um Elizabeth, you KNOW how my boy is!!! and I hate to say it, everything James does Evan has done before him, I can probably pinpoint WHEN James will do it!
I am SO sorry that you feel you need to leave the library, I think I know who you are talking about and she says comments like that to me too (and I only have ONE!). Dont let her discourage you, apparently her kids must have been wonderful in public, just kidding!
Anyways, HUGS to you, it will get better (it is getting a little better every day for us), you know all the stories I have about Evan flipping out in public and being SO terribly naughty...just the other day at wal mart he flipped out I brought him right back out of the store without getting a thing, well a guy had just said "someone didnt get what they wanted", as I turned to laugh and say no kidding, Evan did his drop to the ground thing because he was so mad and I stepped on his leg and almost fell over!
Of course everyone thinks you are beating the kid up because he is screaming bloody murder-all because I wouldnt let him run around in the store!
stay strong, dont stop going to the library, just go there when Marcy works, she totally understands!!!
Tara
I know I only have a girl, but I would like to add a short comment:
My dad has always said, "You aren't a parent until you have both sexes." So if it's any consolation, you have my dad's respect. Hee hee! But he's probably right (although I resented the comment since I only have one girl). You have a lot to juggle raising both genders. Isn't it amazing that God created us so uniquely different than the male species?
I hope you can find encouragement from all those moms of boys. And maybe the librarian will someday have a boy grandchild whom she adores and finds to be an angel and can't imagine any other librarian ever finding a problem with her grandson putting a Clifford in the drinking fountain... and then she'll look back and better understand your little James. :)
definately can relate! Caleb has been climbing on my kitchen counters about every 5 minutes all day lately...dumping huge amounts of water all over, into the sugar bowl, etc! don't feel like a bad mom though...he is who God made him and one day all that energy will be directed for good!
It also sounds like your librarian wasn't cut out for the childrens section! Our librarians are easier on my kids than I am! do you have a seperate room or is it part of the whole library?
Bethany
I get it! And I fully agree, as would my sister with 3 boys of her own, that boys are more of all what you described! It can be so challenging to be confident with your parenting when it seems like every time you turn around you are having to re-direct or you just don't connect with what they are doing or why they are doing it! Hang in there! You are a great mommy for James! Be confident with what you are doing with James and God will continue to lead on!
my brother was just like this.... and still is... so good luck!
i have always dreaded having a boy.... hopefully i never will! :P
Boys will be boys!!! :) Im sure youve heard that one already! I wouldnt worry too much about having a wild little boy! Look at Ryan! He used to be a wild little boy and now he's turned into a handsome sweet gentlemen! Hadley even though she's not a boy is starting to be at that trouble maker age and does things just to get a reaction or is just plain curious. She's constantly trying to run away, but it wont be long until there moving away!
I really would not worry about the librarian! They are not the best librarians with kids. I always hate taking my kids to that library. The first time we went to story time there, i realized the librarian is not all that kid friendly and in my opinion should not be ahead of story time. Lets just say that was the last time we go there and now we go to port. Kids can be kids there. Hadley runs around, is loud, and the best part is, nobody cares! Except me, trying to chase her! :)
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